In addition to watching and writing about films, I’m something of a memorabilia collector. Cursed with a teacher’s salary, I ain’t out there bidding on Dorothy’s ruby slippers or anything, but certainly enjoy haunting local shops for a variety of movie-related stuff. Or when feeling particularly bold, I’ll occasionally overpay for some retro relic on eBay. More often than not, I leave stores empty-handed. But every now and then, I’ll find a small treasure that doesn’t completely empty my wallet and give it a new home in the Dave Cave.
During the holidays, my father, bless his heart, always gives me a rather sizeable check. Thanks to him, I’m afforded the opportunity to blow money on frivolous shit without feeling guilty about it. At no other time would I blow $160 bucks on a Lego set at my age. But not just any Lego set.
I loved Legos as a kid, but back then, sets weren’t created and sold to build anything specific…just a big box of bricks to construct whatever you could imagine. And my collection was huge, the result of being the go-to gift for relatives to buy me when they couldn't think of anything else. Except my grandmother, of course, who gave me a subscription to National Geographic every year under the apparent assumption that’s what preteen boys enjoyed reading. Good thing she never got a look under my mattress.
After leaving such childhood things behind, Lego sets became more elaborate…and expensive. Not only that, you can hardly find just a simple box of bricks anymore. Every set is designed to build something specific, with accompanying instructions. I have a friend - a big Star Wars nut - who shelled out $300 for a Millennium Falcon set. After spending 18 hours putting it together, he proudly brought it to work so we could admire his achievement. I offered a polite attaboy, but was mostly thinking, A little obsessed, aren’t ya guy? I mean, Star Wars is a great movie, but geez.
Lego Jaws, though? 1,497 pieces dedicated to the greatest movie ever made? Just shut up and take my money.
As of this writing, it’s still in its beautiful blue box, and I’m waiting until I have a good 18 hours to kill before putting it together. Afterwards, I’ll proudly show it to my wife so she can admire my achievement, and likely offering her own polite attaboy while silently thinking that money would’ve been put to better use on a pressure washer. Just like she did when I recently dropped 75 bucks on a Pulp Fiction action figure (but more on that later).
Then it will become part of my ever-growing Jaws shrine, never to be disassembled.
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